Am I the problem?

Recently I feel like an outcast in my class.

I thought it was just me .. but i got my confirmation…

It is me who is having problems with the class.. its them.. I have nothing against them. Its them who has a problem with me.. I found out some of the reasons.. but not all.. But if really there is a problem with me.. then why don’t you tell me?

Gosh! Sometimes I find that most Malaysians are more reserved and won’t say things to you but instead behind your back.

I am fine with people talking behind my back, but it reflects in your actions by ostracising me, am not included for lunch or joining you guys for movie or social activity. But I am not saying that you have to invite me all the time, its just what happened to the times in first sem? I fell like I m suddenly shut off from the class.. I feel like you guys only talk to me when it is about the group assignment or asking me a question.

As a “TRIVIA” , I have not had not had a proper conversation with any of my close friends in college since the middle of second semester. Proper conversation meaning that I haven’t had a proper chat like friends should, like sharing about how’s life, talking about stuff.. and doing friend activities.

I do not understand what is going on really. It is not me ostracizing anyone for that matter. I have no qualms or anything against any of my friends at all!

As i said in the email that i sent to all of you. Is there any thing wrong with me? What did I do? Why the sudden change in attitude againts me or for what so ever reason?

Tell me! Cause if not how am I suppose to know I have a problem? How am I going to improve for myself in future?

Cause that is what friends are for, if there is anything wrong we look out for one another, we hang out we socialize we are a part of each other’s life, if there is a problem we voice out and we also help each other.

I was sharing this problem with another friend and do you know what she said?

‘Gosh they are so mean! If they have a problem with you, Danny, they should tell you! Not ignoring you!”

So do I have Friends in college?

Do I need “Friends” who do not care? Why should I be waisting my time with so called “Friends” , if they do not act like one.

There is a quote which say.. “No man is an island…”

I feel like an island in my class…


4 thoughts on “Am I the problem?

  1. eh, dai lou, why the emo-ness?

    I mean seriously. I’ve been telling you this ever since our CIMP days. M’sian students are a twisted bunch. Individualism doesn’t really cut it in this twisted country. Conformity is the norm. It’s either you’re with them or against them or something. Whatever la. Probably you still have yet to get used to the M’sian student’s life, no offense to your international education.

    Heck, even I get this shyte sometimes and I’m possibly more M’sian than the people you know there. Sometimes, you just gotta suck it in, and let things play out. Or maybe this “ignoring” thing could really be a blessing in disguise. Allows you to really filter out who’s real and who’s not. There’s always a stark difference between “Friends” and “Acquaintances”.

    It’s like Kanye West’s song, that which doesn’t kill you only makes you stronger. Or maybe you should be like me, take everyone / everything with a bit of pessimism. Negative yes, but that’s just the way things are no?

    LOL. Maybe you shouldn’t have left Monash haha, jkjk :p

    • dannyboy24 says:

      hey Calvin! thx for the advice it does help me a lot and know that I got friends who stand by me. Nowadays I see clearly who are genuine friends and those who are not.

      Yea. mAyb if Monash wasn’t so tough on it’s students I will probably still be there! jkjk! hehe

  2. screw conformity. don’t wait for them to tell you. i say you should just freakin confront them. ask them why are they ignoring you in the first place.

    then! at least you can emo with less ambiguity. you’ll Know why, instead of Wondering why they’re ostracizing you.

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