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life goes on…

i havent got an update lately… not sure if everything is alrite or not..  but i surely hope so… 

i have already decided to move on as there is nothing much i can do but just to pray… but i thank u guys again… on behalf of her family i thank u guys for ur prayers… and for me… thx for ur sms, emails from u guys who r studying overseas….including my cell leader Li Yenn and Ven Xhin a fellow cell member… ur sms and emails have kept me going… and i would also like to thank God who has guided me with words of wisdom from ur word in the bible have helped me persevere on and also not to lean on my own understanding and also that u will bless those who continue to trust their life fully unto u…. 
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continue to persevere… continue to live life to the fullest…

it’s coming to 7 days now… she is still in a coma… the pass 6 days has been a real rough ride for me… 

when i first found out on friday morning during break from Com Graphics class… the call that dropped an atom bomb on me the last few days…. i didn’t know how to reach or what to react to the situation…. i didn’t know whether to be angry… sad ? 
My collage mates did notice that i was in a bad mood and out of place…. but i didnt wanna say anything to anyone then… i was just.. pure mad then….
during the weekend i had to pretend nothing happen at all… i had to keep my face lit up happy like it was any normal weekend…but when i got home.. i just cried…. i just cried my heart out…. 2 nights… 
since monday till tuesday… i did talk to a few people only but thats cause they know when to  talk… they listened  which was what i needed… i didnt need someone who keeps asking me if i was ok every 5 mins….
i get a call from Bkk everyday at night… so that i can get an update on the progress and so that i can speak to torrie, hoping that in her coma, she can still be able to hear my voice… 
but yesterdays call was uncalled for… her mum told me that they were gonna decide to pull the plug on the life support unit that is carrying her heart beat and keeping her alive…. as the docs said taht its impossible to find a donor with that particular body part… 
when she got knocked in the accident… something hit the back of her head so hard that it created a hole in her skull and it damaged part of her brain… normally its the whole brain that gets damaged but hers was partial… thats y its difficult to find a donor… 
so tuesday was another atom bomb…. but harder… as it makes it seem so easy just to save money on the Life support system and pull the plug… 
during that day Hwee Yen did try to call me in the afternoon a few times in fact… but i was in class so i couldn’t pick it up… ( btw i m in no favoritism of Hwee Yen or Jon Koo… both of u have been equally encouraging to me 😀 … n i thank u guys again…. u guys r like my big sis and bro who i can turn to for advice…)
its good that i get to talk to Jon and Hwee Yen who told me that i could talk to them anytime i want and Hwee Yen said that anytime i can come by to play Saboteur which did put a smile on my face… 
on behalf of torrie and her family i thank u all for ur prayers and ur constant support for them… and for me… i thank u guys like wise for understanding where i m rite now… and now i m much better after consoling some of u guys.. thx again… 
Danny…
  
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i can’t leave… dont give up hope torrie… have a lot of people who cares abt u… especially me…

As those of u who r close to me know abt my long distance relationship with my girlfriend Torrie whom i met in high school in thailand. 

I just heard news today, that last night, she went out with a few friends for drinks at a club… her friend gave her a lift home at around 2 in the morn… quite stupid really…. all of girls were intoxicated with alcohol (according to the docs)… especially the one driving… all i from Torrie’s mum is that the driver hit a curb and then lost control of the car and smacked bang a tree… 
Torrie is in a coma rite now… the others are ok… Torrie was sitting in the front next to the driver… docs said upon impact she must have hit something really hard. 
damn it Torrie… u knew better… 
I have always told her to be in control of what she drinks… she has low alcohol tolerance… she n her friends must have drank quite a bit to lose their sanity to be able to think what they r doing when they got in the car and start the engine… they r smart girls… n it took one stupid mistake to cause a life threatening event… 
n wtf…. it had to be torrie didn’t it…  DAMN IT!!!! damn it… what r the chances…
its so frustrating when i cant do anything about it… i’m stuck here… and she’s in a coma in Bammunggrad Hospital in Bangkok… lying there… probably with her mum at her side crying her eyes out… i should be there…i should be there next to her… 
I’m stuck here buying my education… i cant leave…. i’m commitments to attend to i cant leave…. what the heck? … my parents wont let me go… i can’t leave… the only way is to book the first flight direct to Bkk… get the taxi to speed down straight to the hospital… i don’t care how much it cost i’ll go… thats what i wish i can do… but i cant… i have to think straight n back into reality… 
3 days ago.. we ended our 5 years  of long distance relationship… it wasn’t a bad break up but.. but both  of us knew it was coming… but now we are best friends… she is still the only person who understands me and my other half… and it could be over…. 
i don’t have much to say rite now.. i guess its the effect of having such a shock of such events happening and it can even be prevented…
Torrie… its now btwn u and God…. i cant do anything, mum and dad cant do anything ur friends cant do anything more than HOPE TO GOD.. u’ll wake up…Torrie i wish could be there right now, everyday i’ll be at ur side…. holding ur hands in mine till u wake up… but i cant….
i can’t…
all i can do is pray for u to wake up from the bloody coma… 
i’ll play our songs over and over again and again… thats all i can do… (Incubus – Drive and Cranberries – Linger)
To my college friends… Chloe, Karmen, Sherman, Shermaine, Shy Theng, Ken n Farid… Sorry for treating u guys like crap today… thx for trying to help me… i didnt want to say anything.. one cause i just heard tis news i just dont wanna let all my anger and frustration on u guys or accidentally just burst out in college… and 2ndly i just dont wanna it so i wont have to repeat myself and probably would have just got angry then… hope u guys understand… 

Danny… 

p.s if u guys read this send me a text message that u have read it just so i’ll know…
Incubus – Drive
Sometimes, I feel the fear of uncertainty stinging clear
And I can’t help but ask myself how much I let the fear
Take the wheel and steer
It’s driven me before
And it seems to have a vague, haunting mass appeal
But lately I’m beginning to find that I
Should be the one behind the wheel

Whatever tomorrow brings, I’ll be there
With open arms and open eyes yeah

Whatever tomorrow brings, I’ll be there
I’ll be there

So if I decide to waiver my chance to be one of the hive
Will I choose water over wine and hold my own and drive?
It’s driven me before
And it seems to be the way that everyone else gets around
But lately I’m beginning to find that
When I drive myself my light is found

Whatever tomorrow brings, I’ll be there
With open arms and open eyes yeah

Whatever tomorrow brings, I’ll be there
I’ll be there

Would you choose the water over wine
Hold the wheel and drive

Linger by Cranberries

If you, if you could return, don’t let it burn, don’t let it fade. 

I’m sure I’m not being rude, but it’s just your attitude, 
It’s tearing me apart, It’s ruining everything. 

I swore, I swore I would be true, and honey, so did you. 
So why were you holding her hand? Is that the way we stand? 
Were you lying all the time? Was it just a game to you? 

But I’m in so deep. You know I’m such a fool for you. 
You got me wrapped around your finger, ah, ha, ha. 
Do you have to let it linger? Do you have to, do you have to, 
Do you have to let it linger? 

Oh, I thought the world of you. 
I thought nothing could go wrong, 
But I was wrong. I was wrong. 
If you, if you could get by, trying not to lie, 
Things wouldn’t be so confused and I wouldn’t feel so used, 
But you always really knew, I just wanna be with you. 

But I’m in so deep. You know I’m such a fool for you. 
You got me wrapped around your finger, ah, ha, ha. 
Do you have to let it linger? Do you have to, do you have to, 
Do you have to let it linger? 

And I’m in so deep. You know I’m such a fool for you. 
You got me wrapped around your finger, ah, ha, ha. 
Do you have to let it linger? Do you have to, do you have to, 
Do you have to let it linger? 

You know I’m such a fool for you. 
You got me wrapped around your finger, ah, ha, ha. 
Do you have to let it linger? Do you have to, do you have to, 
Do you have to let it linger? 

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Mother’s Day comin up…


According to Wikepedia (i dont care i m referencing them!), Mother’s Day is a day honoring mothers, celebrated on various days in many places around the world. It’s normally celebrated on the 2nd sunday of May… 


Found this funny article on 5 things not to buy for Mothers on Mothers day… quite funny really… cause i almost 100% agree with what the author (Thadra Petkus) wrote. (click here)

Am still not sure what i’m getting for my mum… too busy with Com Graphics and Comm English assignments…. will have time to shop on Weds… hopefully prices of gifts wont rise up yet…
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